Charles lectures on global warming

When it comes to hypocrisy, they don't come much worse than the Windsors. The Queen (who is patron of the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds) was famously pictured "despatching" a bird that had been injured by her shooting party - by beating it to death with a stick.

Not to be outdone by his mother, Prince Charles has been lecturing the "proles" about global warming. Apparently its a problem and its something we should be doing something about (in case you hadn't heard).

Charles told the BBC:

"We should be treating, I think, the whole issue of climate change and global warming with a far greater degree of priority than I think is happening now"

Most would agree with this sentiment - the impact as well of the causes of global warming are widely known. But whilst many of us choose lower emission cars, public transport and cycling/walking as means of transport, the Windsors have shown a preference for helicopters - which use many times more fuel than a car for the same trip.

In the Times it was recently reported (in coverage of the Royal Budget):

On one occasion, Prince Charles took a chartered helicopter from his home Highgrove in Tetbury to nearby Gloucester and then on to Buckingham Palace for £4,031. His engagements included a Prince’s Trust event and a visit to Smithfield Market. In April last year, the Princess Royal took a chartered helicopter ride from her home Gatcombe Park to Thorncote Green for £4,710 to present rosettes at a pony club.

Once again the Windsor rule is "do as we say, not as we do".

More information:
BBC News - Prince's plea over climate change
The Times - Queen wins rebate as price of party cakes soars

When Harry's dad met Di

It has long been speculated that Prince Harry's real father is Diana's ex-lover, James Hewitt. However, royalists and Hewitt himself have always claimed this is impossible because he only met Diana for the first time in 1986, and Harry was born in 1984. Now a new witness has produced evidence suggesting Hewitt was lying all this time.

Best of all, it's a first hand witness to the couple's first meeting: James Hewitt himself.

Under hypnosis for a TV interview, Hewitt admits not only that he first met Diana in 1981, but that he began a sexual relationship with her in 1981 or 1982, at least a full 2 years before Harry was born.

He also claims that the secret service threatened him.

The admission destroys yet another royalist argument, a lie that has been repeated again and again by royalists on this very site. The evidence for Hewitt being Harry's father gets stronger all the time. No wonder the royals will do anything to avoid a DNA test for Harry. They obviously knew all this time that Hewitt was lying.

More information
The Mirror - Hewitt hypnotized

Royal finances under scrutiny

MPs have been examining the finances of the Queen and Prince Charles. In addition to payments from the civil list, both have other sources of income from "private" estates.

The Duchy of Lancaster accounts show that the Queen benefited from a surplus of £9.7m, a 19.6% increase on the year before, while this year's Duchy of Cornwall accounts showed that Prince Charles's private income from his estates at £13.2m, up 11% on the previous year.

These amounts are in addition to civil list payments that the Royals receive from the state.

Both the Duchy of Lancaster and Duchy of Cornwall are exempt from capital gains tax and corporation tax, and are passed upon death without being subject to any inheritance tax. These tax breaks alone are worth several million pounds per year to the Queen and Prince Charles.

The accounts also show that the Duchy of Cornwall purchased a house for Michael Fawcett, Charles's very close friend and personal assistant. In 2003 Mr Fawcett obtained unprecedented injunctions preventing a raft of UK newspapers publishing allegations that he was caught in bed with Prince Charles.

MP have also voiced unease about the Duchy hiring interior designer Annabel Elliot. Mrs Elliot was paid to renovate three holiday cottages on the Isles of Scilly. MPs have pointed out a possible conflict of interest - Mrs Elliot happens to be the sister of Camilla Parker Bowles!

Many UK taxpayers will likely be shocked that they are having their own incomes taxed at up to 40%+, whilst the richest in the land, with jobs for life, are able to inherit large estates without paying inheritance tax, and then run those estates at a profit without paying any corporation or capital gains tax.

Cronyism, tax dodging and corruption. The changes in the House of Windsor appear largely cosmetic.

More information
The Guardian - MPs tell Prince of Wales: Open up
The Observer - Prince's £12m salary investigated

Bed-hopping royal gets found out

It sounds a familiar story - a royal playboy heir with a lifestyle funded by other people getting involved in a sex scandal. However, in this particular case, the Royal is Prince Albert II of Monaco. And unlike the British heir to the throne (and perhaps strangely for a man named after a type of penis piercing), his scandal involves heterosexual sex, rather than a sordid homosexual romp with his manservant.

Prince Albert had admitted fathering a child with a French air stewardess and there are rumours of plenty more. Coincidentally Prince Albert's father changed the constitution according to the BBC:

Prince Albert, often dubbed the "playboy prince", has for years appeared reluctant to get married or start a family, which perhaps prompted his father to change Monaco's constitution in 2002.

Previously, the principality would have become part of France in the absence of a male heir. Rainier had the law changed so that, in the event of Albert remaining childless, Princesses Caroline and Stephanie could follow their brother, who was proclaimed regent during Rainier's last days.

Under Monaco's constitution, a child born out of wedlock doesn't count as an heir.

More information
BBC News - Monaco prince admits love child

Former archbishop says Charles should marry Camilla

The Former Archbishop of Canterbury, George Carey, has told the Times Newspaper that he believes Prince Charles should marry Camilla Parker Bowles.

In the past, remarriage of divorcees in Church was restricted to those whose previous spouse had died.

However Carey believes that Charles should marry Camilla.

Lord Carey told the Times the prince was more "sinned against than sinning" in his marriage to Diana, Princess of Wales, and should now be able to remarry.

He added "The Christian Faith is all about forgiveness. We all make mistakes... There is no doubt that there has been a strong loving relationship, probably since they were very young... He is the heir to the throne and he loves her. The natural thing is that they should get married."

Mrs Parker Bowles is also a divorcee, having cheated on her husband Andrew Parker Bowles - by having an affair with Prince Charles. His constant cheating on Diana led her to attempt suicide.

Prince Charles famously slept with Camilla on the eve of his wedding to Princess Diana.

George Carey also appears apparently unconcerned by Charles longstanding homosexual relationship with Michael Fawcett, his "aide".

Many have questioned whether a self-confessed liar and adulterer such as Prince Charles can ever be head of the Church of England, let alone head of state of our Country.

More Information
BBC News - Charles should marry, says Carey

Dunce Harry fails basic army IT test

The British Army increasingly relies on technology these days - scores of Arab women and children can now be killed with a simple click on a mouse.

As a consequence, trainee British Army officers are expected to be computer literate. This includes Prince Harry, who was let in to officer training with just two A-Levels at Grades B & D, despite virtually all other recruits being required to have a degree.

Unfortunately though, Harry's lack of intellect is beginning to show - he's just failed a basic Army competency test in IT.

According to the Mirror:
"instructors were amazed that Harry failed it.

He seemed to lack the same skills as the other recruits."

The Mirror also reported:

The prince has revealed he wants to join the Household Cavalry when his military training comes to an end.

He is understood to favour one of the most senior regiments in the British Army for a host of reasons. Best known for its ceremonial duties, it appeals to his love of horses and playing polo.

UK Taxpayers will be glad to know that their supposed security now rests partly in the hands of a borderline retard who has joined up to play polo (entirely financed of course by the UK taxpayer).

The Mirror - Harry Flunks Army Test

Charles to marry Camilla

Clarence house has announced that Prince Charles will marry Camilla later this year, though no date has been set.

It is now widely accepted that Prince Charles conducted an affair with Camilla before, during and after his marriage to Diana. Diana is on the record as claiming that Camilla was one of the primary reasons for the break up of her marriage to Charles.

Some may find it rather curious that Edward VIII had to abdicate in order to marry Mrs Simpson, with the reason given publicly that it was because she was a divorcee. With hindsight, the couple's well documented Nazi sympathies were far more likely to have been a cause for concern. Camilla Parker Bowles, as well as being widely acknowledged as the wrecker of Charles' marriage is also a divorcee. Apparently now the Archbishop of Canterbury also supports the future head of his church marrying a divorcee, homewrecker and adulterer. So much for moral guidance to the anglican community, as well as the British public at large.

When Paul Burrell was aboard the Royal Yacht Britannia during a period involving a gay porn scandal, it was suggested to him by the Queen that he should "find a wife".

Prince Charles was involved in a scandal of his own a while back, though heavy-handed legal action attempted to keep the scandal from the British public (though the details were widely reported overseas). Police even confiscated foreign newspapers carrying details that were brought into the UK by Channel Tunnel passengers.

The announcement of marriage comes after MPs were seeking access to the accounts of the Duchy of Cornwall to see how much money the Prince provides for Camilla, as well as just how much tax the Prince's 'business' avoids through exemption from capital gains and corporation tax.

More Information:
BBC News - Prince Charles to Marry Camilla

ThroneOut Mint presents the Charles & Di mug conversion kit

The recent announcement of the forthcoming wedding of serial adulterer Prince Charles to serial adulteress Camilla Parker Bowles has had the owners of high-quality historical collectables in a panic. What to do with those embarrassing old Charles & Di cups from the early 80s?

You remember the day you heard our future king was going to marry. You were delighted. And when the wedding arrived in 1981, you just couldn't help but stack up your shelves with cheaply manufactured tat celebrating the event and pledging your undying loyalty. Even Spurs winning the FA Cup couldn't top your delight.

But sadly things went down hill. Your Diana collectables remained in your display cabinet only by virtue of her untimely demise in a mysterious car accident. The signed photo of Sol Campbell from the early 90s was not so lucky.

But with Charles set to move on, those Charles and Di mugs are an unpleasant reminder of better times. You'll look like an ageing, out-of-touch square, rather than a modern standard-bearer for constitutional monarchy.

Fortunately ThroneOut Mint has the answer. The ThroneOut Mint Charles & Diana Mug Conversion Kit. Featuring a sticker specially designed to fit over the face of the mad, deceased ex-wife, you can turn those embarrassing old collectables into something to be proud of again. Do your bit to airbrush over recent royal history - buy the ThroneOut Mint Charles & Diana Mug Conversion Kit now.

Harry in new fancy dress shocker

Prince Harry was embroiled in further scandal today after pictures of his latest fancy dress outfit emerged.

Harry in military uniform shocker

Prince Harry has caused outrage after pictures of him dressed as a British soldier emerged last night. In the photos, he is seen wearing a British Army uniform and even giving a British Army salute while smiling and appearing to be enjoying himself.

His actions were instantly condemned by angry representatives of communities around the world that have suffered at the hands of the British Army in Ireland, India, Africa, China, the Middle-East and throughout the Americas.

For hundreds of years until the latter half of the 20th century, Britain fought and occupied numerous countries around the world in brutal fashion. During this time, the British Army was the tool of British aggression and dictatorial control over the locals. Incidents such as the 'Black Hole of Calcutta' symbolized to many the uncompromizing tactics of British imperial occupation, using it to justify a historical form of 'War on Terror'.

Attacks were invariably launched on bogus grounds, a tactic still used by the British Government to this day when seeking to launch wars in pursuit of valuable resources that the target country possesses.

Many hundreds of thousands of people died under British occupation, overseen by the notorious British Army.

Buckingham Palace has apologized for the photographs and made clear that the Prince very much regretted his actions and would visit many of the countries previously violated by the British Army while taking luxury holidays at the tax payers' expense over the rest of his lifetime.

They also stressed that dressing up as a pretend member of the British military was nothing more than harmless fancy dress, just as it was for previous royals including Prince Phillip, Prince Andrew, Prince Edward, Prince Charles, as well as Harry's own father.

More Information:
BBC News - Harry urged to say sorry publicly